On this day, 65 years ago, John Michael “Ozzy” Osbourne was welcomed into this world, and it would never be the same again. Rock and roll’s ultimate rockstar, Osbourne would go on to mainstream success with the legendary metal group Black Sabbath as well as a lengthy solo career following his split from the group. Currently, Black Sabbath (with Osbourne) is back on the road in Europe and will return to the U.S. in Spring of 2014.

For all of Ozzy’s musical achievements, he is also one of the funniest human beings alive. Always reliable for a great quote, here are some of Ozzy’s best moments caught on camera, including epic battles with TV remotes as well as his distaste for bubbles. It should also go without saying that nearly every word out of Ozzy’s mouth is NSFW.

“Who the f*** is Justin Bieber?”

Ozzy doesn’t listen to new metal bands today because then it goes into his brain and comes out his mouth, or something. He also doesn’t care much for that Justin Bieber character. One would assume this interview occurred around the same time the two filmed a Super Bowl commercial together where Ozzy had the same question.

“It didn’t exactly work out like Cinderella…”

Decked out in a zebra print robe, this charming interview took place while Ozzy prepared some breakfast for himself. Armed with barely-cooked bacon, watery scrambled eggs and half a glass of orange juice, Osbourne tells the tale of life in a rock and roll band. He touches on groupies, drugs, touring, managers stealing money and all of the other juicy details people love to hear. The details are far juicier than the bacon he attempted to cook, which sat in a pan for a few seconds before Ozzy decided it was time to eat.

Nitrous can’t stop The Prince of Darkness

One of the overlooked aspects of extensive drug use over a long period of time is the immunity built up to other substances. For example, the nitrous at the dentist’s office. Noted by the doctor as “Ozzy Level,” the high level of nitrous clearly didn’t deter the rock star–at least initially. As the deep breaths reached double digits, Ozzy was clearly struggling, evidenced by his strong effort to drink a cup of water at the end of this clip.

“Bubbles, Sharon?!”

Bubbles are not rock and roll, Sharon.

“You need to have computer knowledge to turn the TV on!”

As if this clip couldn’t possibly be funnier, the producers of The Osbournes decided to splice in the family’s A/V guy explaining, in simple terms, how to use the remote. Despite watching hours of The Weather Channel, Ozzy still thinks it’s 2,000 degrees in Afghanistan.